Sep 21, 2009

A lifting off...

Hello to anyone and all that read/have read this blog. I can't tell you how much I've enjoyed managing this thing. Not only has it let me feel in touch, but it has provided with a goal - albeit humble - throughout the whirlwind that was my year in Korea. But, as that year has come to a close, so too will this blog.

Though fear not! The internet is not rid of me yet! I have started a new site dedicated to all things post-Korea and pre-whateverthefuckiwilldonext. It exists, but I've yet to really get it cracking. I decided to switch over to the uber-hipsters at wordpress, and all their minutae has impeded these early stages. But I assure you; once I master their system, you will be inundated with over-important, under-thought ramblings about my life and all it entails.

In closing, thanks so much for reading. Knowing that any of you took time to stay with me was one of the great joys of my Asian experience. I'll miss this site enormously.

If you are still interested in my happenings, feel free to check out Roktova.wordpress.com

Anyeongigyeseyo!

Aug 28, 2009

Great Lake Swimmers - When it Flows


Tomorrow is another now
Waiting to happen...

- GLS

Aug 25, 2009

The Mountain Goats - International Small Arms Traffic Blues


I recently saw a friend tweet (I'm assuming you're aware of Twitter.com) about a band called The Mountain Goats, and I became curious. To be honest, I'm not above being interested in a band because their name conjures up cool images. But beyond that embarrassing aspect, I remembered quickly reading something about them being folk-y and minimalist - two scenes that will always earn a listen from me. Thanks to the casually illegal nature of internet music trading, I was able to grab one of their albums not 5 minutes later. It's folk-y and minimalist and everything I dig about the far flung progeny of Elliot Smith. Moreover it has one of the coolest allegorical songs I've ever heard. Here's a snippet...

Our love is like the border between Greece and Albania
Our love is like the border between Greece and Albania
Trucks loaded down with weapons
Crossing over every night
Moon yellow and bright
There is a shortage in the blood supply
But there is no shortage of blood
The way I feel about you baby can't explain it
You got the best of my love

check out the full tune in all its glory at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_0nROFZDvQ&feature=related

Lion's Final Roar


Today America has lost one of its last true statesman. Ted Kennedy is no longer, but I hope that he may rest with the knowledge that so many of his dreams - racial equality, health care reform, a spirit of compromise - are perhaps more alive now than ever. His achievements will be studied for years to come, and I have no doubt that my children, though totally unaware of him, will live in a world that he bettered for them.

Aug 4, 2009

Booya!


-cnn.com

Booty anda Best

For each week of the camp we all must monitor a group project. The first week had us charting dance moves and drilling lyrics for a 'song contest' held last Sunday for parents and various Korea suits. This week we are supposed to conduct some sort of role play, which has manifested itself as the kids recreating scenes from various Disney classics.

My group stumbled upon Beauty and the Beast. It's probably no better or worse than anything else they could have been assigned. I work with the lowest level students, so their comprehension of these stories is essentially nil. That said, the show must go on, and so they are still forced to script read and drill scenes. Last night my Korean co teacher sequestered the girls in a sort of tryout for the Belle character, and I was left to run a 4-page section with the boys. What ensued in this dudes' session was easily the most hilarious thing I've been a part of at camp.

Now, don't take this as me knocking these kids because they couldn't comprehend the scene. That's hardly the case. Most of them actually did grasp the arc of things. What got me going was how they suddenly broke out of their shell and gave Beauty everything they had. The narrarrator adopted a faux deep voice, the Prince/Beast was rife with passion, Belle (as played by an 11 year old boy) exhibited moments of real anguish. As funny as this whole thing was, I'd say it was equally fascinating. I was witnessing boys teetering on the precipice of all-consuming self-consciousness (teenagerdom). The equation was simply perfect. Any older and they would not have attacked such an effeminate piece with such gusto, for fear of seeming uncool. I don't know. Maybe it's not worth all this thought.

As frustrating as this camp can be/is, moments like that remind me that I'm right where I need to be.

Aug 2, 2009

Camp Rundown

I'm halfway done with this monster! Here's a list of some highlights and pitfalls...

- (during a "If you're happy and you know it..." activity) "If you're tired and you know it crazy..."

- Being told 5 minutes prior that we had to teach until 9pm when we had been told all day that we would only teach from 7:30 - 8. Why? Because the visiting parents were angry their kids would only be in class for 30 minutes that day - the one day when they weren't in class for 10 solid hours.

- Seeing the sun come up from the roof of our dorm complex (shhh...)

- Completely lucking into a single room.

- Being told by an 11 year old girl that she likes beer (pitfall)...

- Being told I look bad/tired after a marvelous 8 hours of sleep (pitfall)...

- (Upon entering a freshly smoked-in room) "Teacher, this is [like] my house!"

- Playing duck, duck, goose and watching a girl idly stand there smiling once picked. At first you think she doesn't know how to play, though there's no way she couldn't, and it soon becomes clear that she simply doesn't want to. Only, instead of complaining, she just stands there smiling as if she just pulled a prank on you. (Maybe you had to be there...)

- (the captions of a student drawing depicting the final scene of The Three Pigs) "Hahaha. Silly wolf!"

- For whatever reason, when I turn on my ipod, the only thing that seems to make sense is Van Halen's "Dance the Night Away".

- As much as my arm hair had baffled students before, nothing has reached the hysteria it has caused out here. There's not a single class period that goes by without a solid shucking of my arm.

- Drinking beers in our temporary dorm homes has caused collegiate nostalgia like never before.

- Playing a spirited rendition of Paul Simon's "Me and Julio Down the Schoolyard" for 250+ captive Korean parents.

- Staring in awe as one of my Korean co-teachers, who insisted he was not very good at guitar, casually ripped through 30 minutes of flawless 4-finger picked classical pieces.

Jul 29, 2009

Huh?


Dave Carnie, a true American.

Owl Moon


Being constantly surrounded by elementary-age kids has got me reminiscing about my own youth. In doing so, I've realized that I miss the hell out of this book.

Jul 27, 2009

Jonsi and Alex - Riceboy Sleeps


So lately I can't stop listening to music that sounds the way a beautiful dream feels. Naturally, one would assume I would drift towards Sigur Ros. But, I feel as if I've been there, and it's important to me that I find out if anyone can do it better. While I have made some valuable discoveries in this field (most notably Grouper) my new favorite dream-pop disc still falls within the Sigur Ros stable.

Riceboy Sleeps is the product of Sigur Ros frontman Jonsi Birgisson and his artistic/romantic collaborator Alex Somers. The Ros-ian vibe is almost immediately apparent, and while many will say this is nothing more than a watered-down b-sides cut, I would have to disagree. To me, Riceboy feels like most other breakaway solo works by popular frontmen: somewhat derivative of the original, but not in a way that detracts from the accomplishment at hand (see: A Perfect Circle, David Byrne, Trey Anastasio, Dave Matthews).

This album would be nature's soundtrack during the hatching of a butterfly, if such a soundtrack existed.

Somehow, no matter how loud you play it, Jonsi and Alex's music never impedes the processes of thought or introspection. On the contrary, I would argue it enhances both.

Do yourself a favor; get this album, get some good headphones, and find some time and space to employ one through the other.

Jonsi and Alex - keeping this blog introspective and socially relevant... (God, I love sweaters.)

Those final agonizing breaths...

The end is nigh! I've been saying it for months, but now reality supports the statement. I just finished my first day of summer camp - the only thing that stands between me and 5 weeks of unbridled freedom (Vietnam > Jeju Island > Ulsan finale > Incheon > Washington DC > Woodstock, NY > Boston > VT!!!!! > Mass [Boston? Cape Cod?] > Washington DC). Oh to be young, responsibility-free, and able to pseudo-support yourself!

Knowing that such things lay ahead, in the NEAR future, is truly a heady feeling (Webster's version). That said, completing this gig will not be easy by any stretch of the word. For the next 14 days I will teach approximately 10 classes/day between the hours of 9am and 8:20pm. Moreover, this is not a situation from which I can return home at the end of the day. This camp has sequestered all 30-or-so of us out in Youngsan, Korea - exactly 30 minutes from the nearest anything. And while I'm humbled by saying this, thank god we at least have Internet in our dorm rooms. The inability to mindlessly absorb obscure nothings for a few hours each night might have seriously affected me (though maybe for the better).

Last night was rough. I cowered in my bed just dreading the fact that falling asleep meant waking to the reality of this camp experience. As always, that was a totally irrational reaction. The camp is not so bad. In fact, by a stroke of sheer luck I somehow stumbled into having my own room. I can't tell you how pumped I am about that. I need my space, and the more of it I can have the better.

That luck worked in my favor is both beautiful and completely unusual. Past experiences normally have me getting laughed at for my god awful bad luck. And just so you know, had I not pulled off a little side-dealing, I would have been stuck in a room with a socially awkward, middle-aged, deeply religious, and irrepressibly irritating dude named Joe. All I wanted was to not be HIS roommate, and I ended up somehow being my own.
Though as my father said, I should probably get prepared for some sort of late-arrival to rain on my parade. And if that does go down, you can rest assured that he will have either a) a flatulence issue b) a masturbation issue c) a snoring issue or d) all of the above. If my history is any indication, I best begin preparing his bedding now...

Jul 22, 2009

Metallica - Death Magnetic


After a few solid weeks of straight Phish and dense indie rock I needed something... a wild card. I had let several months of cyber dust gather on Metallica's latest, so it seemed right to let it be the album to jerk me from noodly hipsterville. Great call. Death Magnetic is nearly perfect. Give this album a spin if you ever feel the inclination. My bet is that you find it worthwhile.

Key track: All Nightmare Long

Yes, I just whole heartedly repped a Metallica album. So what?

Jul 21, 2009

Naked City - Speedfreaks


Equal parts pure hipster, ruthlessly inaccessible, and hardcore genius.

Can You Feel It?


The hot, sultry days of summer have most certainly reached Ulsan, South Korea. Summer brings about many things - pummeling rainstorms, longer days, melting ice cream - but none less innocent than the wandering eyes it provokes. Everyone is looking to score. Let's face it: everyone's been prepping their bodies, everyone's used the winter as a prep/rest up period, and summer means game time. This is true for people in most places, but doesn't seem to be the case in Ulsan, at least not as I've seen with many of the Koreans out and about. However, if summer has done anything to this little industrial hamlet, it has unquestionably stirred up the loins of Ulsan's resident Dragonflies.

I'm not kidding when I say that the skies are filled with the horniest dragon flies I've ever seen. They're everywhere, and they're doing everything and anything to make it happen. I've never seen so many of these things in my life, and while at first I was alarmed by their presence, I'm now kind of pumped to have them around. After all, their intentions are probably not that different than mine or some of my more libidinous friends... well, except we're not trying to procreate, so to say.

To give you an idea of their scene, I ran by an ordinary tree today, and I'm dead serious when I say the whole thing was abuzz with the sound of dragonfly love. If you magically transformed that tree into a trailer filled with humans doing what those flys were doing... whoa! It would have been Calligula-esque. I was so taken aback by the sound of their love making chirps, that I literally said out loud, "Oh man! That's so intense!" I kid you not (and I think I got stares as a result). Listen, I'm not an idiot. Clearly, like secadas and other insects, this is the traditional mating season for Korean Dragon Flys. I just can't help but see the parallels between their aims and those of so many of my friends. None of us are as aggressive as these winged studs, but I think there's a shared value... whether they know it or not.

Jul 20, 2009

Bibimbap and me.


As far as I'm concerned, there are few lunch options more perfect than bibimbap. It is a dead-on example of why I'm going to miss Korean food so much: it's healthy, but not aggressively so. There's literally nothing unhealthy in a bowl of bibimbap, but you wouldn't know that from the taste. So often I meet people who feel that they must forego flavor to put good things in their body. Perhaps that's America's problem, because Koreans have a litany of healthy foods at their disposal, and almost all of it f***ing rocks! And this coming from the guy who existed on a diet of pizza, sandwiches, and cereal for the better part of his life. I mean, how cool is it that I'm totally full and satisfied from a serving of rice, veggies, and a fried egg (the least healthy guy at the party)?! The simple beauty of this dish is unassailable. I'll never knock a blt, but come on...

Oh yea, the cost of this delicacy? Somewhere in the ballpark of $2.

Grouper - Dragging a Dead Deer Up a Hill


I just spent the last 45 minutes listening to this album, and it was perfect. I'm not saying the album itself was perfect - in actuality it's no better or worse than any of the other airy, blissed-out, dreamscape pop I've heard - but it's role in that 45 minutes was, in fact, perfect. It didn't ask too much of me. It required nothing beyond a mellow disposition, low lighting, a content stomach, and magnificent headphones. Simply put, I'm overjoyed that Grouper and I could meet at that junction in time. I believe it was mutually beneficial.

...


- Though in reality a Grouper has nothing to do with the artist I discuss above, I want to let it be known that I'm pretty pumped about the fish as well. RIP. (How much fun is this guy having?!)

Jul 16, 2009

Blissful Repetition


I've now listened to this song 10+ times in a row.
Ryan Adams - Oh my god whatever, etc.

A Great Baseball Tune


The water's wide
It's deep and wide
It's down a long and windy road
And everyone knows that a boy can't swim it

In Narrow's Church
The white walled church
They're singing that gospel song
"Bye and Bye, I will see my King"
The clouds will break
And the pews shake
And the choir softly cries
And it's Georgia in the spring of 1905

Ty Cobb
You're dead and gone
You had a game like a war machine
And through the great
Hall of Fame you wander
In Tigers Field
A girl in heels

She had a face like a magazine
And through the long metal stands she wandered

The ball soared
The crowd roared
The scoreboard sweetly hummed
And tomorrow you'll surely know whose won

I'm on First
And you're on Third
And all the wolves are all between
And everyone's sure that the game is over

The catcher's hard
He's mean mean and hard
And he nips at the batter's heels
And everyone's sure that the game is over

The ball soars
And the crowd roars
And the scoreboard sweetly hums
And tomorrow you'll surely know whose won

The water's wide
It's deep and wide
It's a down a long and windy road
And everyone knows that a boy can't swim it

The clouds break
And the pews shake
And the preacher's feet do pound
As the rain beats the streets of Cooperstown

- The Felice Brothers: Cooperstown

Jul 15, 2009

Jul 14, 2009

A Change Is gonna... who's making galbi?

I often ponder the change that will come in Korea when the next generation rise to adulthood. Currently - what with Korea's rigid elder-idolization - the word of the old folks is cast iron in Korean society. 30-40 year olds do not have prevailing say here. This country is more or less run by people - mostly men - in their 60's and 70's. These people have no tolerance for certain things. From what I've seen, here are some things that most elderly Koreans cannot tolerate, whether they be a farmer or the president:

- Women smoking in public
- Foreigners speaking on public transportation
- A female waiting until her mid-30's to wed
- Japan, or the admiration thereof
- A wife who does not become a surrogate mother to her husband
- Seeing a foreign man and a Korean (read: Asian) woman that are seemingly a couple
- Anything that deviates from the norm
- Being told that they're wrong, or to stop...

There are no doubt other, less apparent, aspects of life that elderly Koreans cannot handle, but these are the major examples I've witnessed. I believe the expectations of these people are significant only because they are on the decline.

It is my belief that as the old guard dies out, so too will their beliefs. This is hardly a revolutionary idea. Obviously all cultures change as younger generations come to power. But few countries I've ever visited or read about are in a position to have as big an overhaul as I believe Korea will. Young Koreans are a people who grew up in a vastly different world than their parents. They know almost nothing of war, they know almost nothing of agricultural labor, they are actively learning English at a furious clip, and they are fully engaged in the process of globalization. In short, the vast majority of young Koreans are progressive in a way that their parents couldn't even process. They [the youth] probably know this, and thus, their parents don't actually get to see how progressive they actually are. It's all hidden from them.

The generation gap in Korea is astounding. Make no mistake about it, regardless of what happens with its northern brethren, Korea will be a country transformed by 2030. I know that sounds like a ways away, but I guarantee you nobody my age ever realized how quickly we'd be knocking on the doorstep of 2010. Christ, that date still sounds like a futuristic, unimaginable age to me.
This is not to say that Korea will become America lite - it won't (that's solely a role reserved for Canada... just kidding, eh). Koreans will never forego a Kimchi diet in favor of one weighed down with burgers and fries. Just in the same way that Koreans will never totally think it's okay to, say, get married twice before they die. These are both western past times, and I believe they will always be so. The change in Korea will seem minor to us Westerners, and will probably go unnoticed. It will most likely be a mass sense that there's no longer a need to hide. For example, interracial couples will not be too intimidated to hold hands. Female smokers will not feel confined to lavatories. Unhappy couples will not dread the social stigma of a divorce (only one divorce). And maybe, just maybe, a few gay Koreans will not feel trapped within special neighborhoods in Seoul - though that's a topic for a whole other discussion.

Korea will progress with the new generation, because Koreans are generally kind hearted people who want others to feel happy. Just like kimchi and soju, the sense of a shared identity will never fully leave Korea. People here want all Koreans to feel joy, not just some of them. So when the open minds of the younger generation take the reigns, I think you will see those minds expand the scope of what is acceptable here. Though, in my opinion, the future doesn't bring a better Korea or a worse Korea; it simply brings the new Korea.

Prediction


Sufjan Stevens will be to our children's indie music what Television and Gang of Four were to ours. Thoughts?

Hey remember that... before the recession? Pt. 13


There was no better waste of an hour than VH1's Behind the Music. Times were simple. Life was good.

Sidenote*
While almost all of the BHTM stories were rife with classic characters, there are some moments that vividly stand out in my mind. Thus, we have my short list of BHTM AllStars...

1. Poison's Bobby Dall - For conveying absolute zero sense that he's potentially speaking to millions of people. "He got to f*** the ultimate b****! I don't see what's so wrong with that." - while discussing lead singer Brett Michael's leaked sex tape with a pre-Tommy Lee Pam Anderson.

2. Motley Crue's Nikki Sixx - For his truly patriotic endurance and awareness of limits. "We used to bring our dealers along on tours, and we would do these things called 'power rails' before shows. These were essentially lines of coke that were 2inches x 6 feet long."

3. Cat Stevens - For the most non-secuitur life-changing religious revelation. "I went swimming at my friend's house in Malibu, and there was a terrible riptide. I was out in the ocean for maybe 1 hour. When I came out, I knew that I had to be a Muslim."

Jul 13, 2009

'Look at all the white men on the street...'


You wanna get down? Que up this war horse at any of middle ager's cocktail party, Slipknot concert, methadone clinic, or awkward hipster party... especially the last 40 seconds.

Seeds of Disapproval


I'm a spry 23 years of age, and there's still a lot that's great about that. I can say I'm closer to 20 than 30, people don't expect as much from as they will in 2 years, and I can still sort of get away with cheeky, boyish things. There's no limit to how pumped I am about all that.

However, it's undeniable that my body is not what it was even 2 years ago. The unforgiving tenets of age are just now beginning to make themselves clear to me, and I really want to punch them in the face.

Let me first say that this is not a post about weight. I put on a bunch of weight in college, but that had absolutely nothing to do with the aging process. High school dictated that I work out a pace that I assumed was normal, but I now consider to be almost unattainable. Think about it; in high school we all must get a solid 90-120 min of excercise Mon-Fri for most of the year. It's not a body image thing, it's just the daily routine of high school sports. Right? All this stops in college. And it happens to stop at the same time you realize that daily boozing, eating, and general lazing about are totally acceptable activities. Thus, you're gaining weight. I get that, and I totally accept it. But Korea's eating habits have more or less gotten me to a place where I'm eating healthier than I have in a long time. So the diet is there, and the exercise will be there just as soon as my teaching obligations lessen. Right. I'm not worried about that.

What I'm really talking about are the biological processes that would be happening regardless of physical fitness. These, to me, are the true signs that I've begun a long, slow (I know I've still got 25 years), decline to middle age.

All of sudden mysterious joints hurt. For the record, I had no idea that such things existed two years ago, and I was heavier then! All of a sudden I have to choose work out activities based on what specific part of my body is the least sore. It's pathetic to think about.

Though no facet of aging is more apparent to me than gratuitous hair growth. Now, some men don't have this problem. There are those dudes out there who are just biologically entitled to a relatively hairless existence. I used to have absolutely no envy for these guys. I did - and still do - consider my body hair to be an exciting part of my physical existence. Chest hair is fun, facial hair is fun... right? Well, yes and no. Like most things that occur in nature, anything can be good, but it is usually only so in moderation. For example, some seasonal rain is helpful to almost everything it covers. But too much rain can cause damaging floods. I feel the same way about my body hair. For the most part it is an aesthetically pleasing and balancing part of my being. But, now that age has taken hold, I'm finding hair in places that are hardly aesthetically pleasing or balancing.

The purpose of body hair is to provide cover/protection for what it covers. So why would the body grow hair on the back? Really, what could it possibly protect on my back? Could it shield me from a blow to the kidneys? No. Could fend off sneak attacks from ravenous animals? No. Could it do any good in preventing sunburn? No. So why is it there? It's there because nature's ability to balance itself hardly ever works. If it did, why would we have invasive plant species, floods, or humans, for that matter. Anything good that nature has ever given us usually ends up spilling just a bit out of the glass. Now, it's easy to clean up most of the time, but still, what a nuisance.

Jul 7, 2009

7 Weeks

So I'll be back in Yankeeland in 7 weeks. Whoa. I guess I'd like to say it feels like yesterday that I arrived here - it kind of does - but in many ways I absolutely feel like I've been gone for 45 weeks. To take a page from D. Hazlett, I'd like to list the things I'm super pumped to have around me September 1.





I'll Be Here


I'll be somewhere in this madness on September 5th, 2009.

... yes that is Billy Bob Thornton.

Koreans work harder than you pt. 4

The Korean version of the SAT is the craziest academic feat I've ever heard of. It's called the Soo Neun, and it IS the lives of all Koreans in the final year of high school. The soo neun is 8 hours long, and tests English, 'social studies', and absolutely everything in between.

This test is the make or break between a Korean who is professionally successful, mediocre, or stalled (assuming everything beyond the test goes well). Korea is not a place where you can drop out of high school, start your own business, and find success in your mid 20's - as several of my friends have done. The rigidity of the professional structure, and the overwhelming power of large conglomerates pretty much makes that option an impossibility.

And so the soo neun is life or death. How do students prepare for this most-olympian of exams? They study... A LOT! They study more than I've ever even imagined. As a high school senior in Korea, you are required to be at school from 9pm to 10pm. Period. No choice. Sports, extracurriculars, after school ice cream with friends... not an option. Plus, you must take a practice soo neun every weekend FOR THE ENTIRE YEAR leading up to the test.

"These poor kids. They must be in the peak of misery throughout this whole ordeal." That's what I thought when I first heard of the exam. Though, I later discovered that's hardly the case. I asked a group of young, female teachers about the test one night at a school dinner, and they had fond memories to share. Most of what they recalled were stories about spending a lot of time with their friends, away from their parents (which is a huge deal in Korea), all engaged in the same activity. It seemed as if their sense of solidarity trumped any realizations of how intense their task was.

A week later I was walking home late at night, when I spotted a large group of students walking my way. I soon saw that they were just part of a larger group leaving their school. I looked at my watch: 10pm. So I asked a group of boys, "are you leaving school?"

"Yes."
"Soo neun?" I asked.
"Ah ha ha, yes. Big test. Very deepeecurt."

But here's the catch: everyone seemed to be having a good time. Nobody looked like a zombie. I saw smiles, couples holding hands, girls giggling in groups, soccer balls careening to and fro, and boys playing grab ass in just the way I would have at that age. I was shocked. It made me recall my countenance after the SAT prep courses of yore... it was certainly nothing like theirs. I'm pretty sure the only thing on my mind was a massive sandwich and internet porn.

A Day on the Banks of... what river is this?


For me, rivers are IT when it comes to summer afternoons. Pools, lakes, even the ocean - I'd take a river over any of them on a listless July day. Rivers just seem that much more rustic and untouched, and that's appealing to me. You'll be hard pressed to find disgusting popsicle stands, kiddie railroads, and sandy asscracks on the banks of any good river. I guess, on the one hand, that's because they're inherently more dangerous than most other water features. But, on the other hand, to those who enjoy their environs, the danger partially makes the experience. It's not blatant danger, but it's present enough to make a full day by the river seem THAT much more exhilarating.

I suppose another part of my river jones has to do with my love of hiking, and the sense of discovery that comes with it. You'll never have to hike to a pool, lake, or ocean, whereas you'll often have to do at least a bit of trekking to find the 'good' spot along a river. This act of walking away from society is a huge part of my river-love. I don't care if the hike from the road to the spot is only 10 minutes. Quite frankly, it often is. Just the simple act of creating distance between myself and the 'front country' is intoxicating. For me, there the hike creates the illusion that I've discovered something special (regardless if there are 40 other people there). It also creates a sense of privacy - like myself and all the other revelers are in some way removed from the confines of society. How that manifests itself... well, you'll just have to come to a river with me someday.

For the most part, river outings in America are minimalist affairs. We'll bring a backpack, some beverages, a towel, and maybe some trail mix or a sandwich. Anything else would be overkill. I should have assumed that Koreans take the complete opposite approach. Three weeks ago I found myself on the banks of a GORGEOUS little river, with enough gear to feed and put up a family for an entire weekend. We had a tent, a miniature gas barbecue, a glut of meat, kimchi, lettuce, various sauces, beers, changes of clothes, and obviously large coolers for all of this. While I still felt as if I had discovered something - via my generous Korean guides/friends - that I had done so with a moving cornucopia seemed like slight overkill. Then again, if I'm not getting out of my comfort zone in Korea, what the hell am I doing here?

Jun 21, 2009

Humble Observations

- It has rained many times since I've been in Korea, but only this morning did I hear thunder.
- Koreans seem to believe that with rain must come umbrellas. Rain jackets are basically only for hiking or a secondary line of defense.
- Korean baseball games are much more fun than their yankee counterpart.
- There is no such thing as understated Korean music. It's all tears or bombast.
- The notion of not owning a cell phone, or not using yours constantly is completely alien to most Koreans.
- Most Koreans will have a cell phone from the time they turn ~ 7 years old.
- Many Korean married couples don't wear their wedding rings.
- Nobody wears black better than Korean women.

Xander Berkeley


This guy will always sketch me out. I absolutely blame the movie Poison Ivy II for this.

The Diminutive, Hennesy-loving Elephant in the Room


(the title of this pic says it all: North Korea is Dark.)

One of the strangest parts of living in South Korea is having to share a border the world's most belligerent and mysterious state: North Korea. I am reminded of this fact almost weekly, though not by anything I see or experience here. Most of my North Korea thoughts emerge because of my American friends and their curiosities/concerns, most of which sound something like this: 'Are you worried?' 'Are Koreans worried?' 'Do you feel safe?' I'm not surprised by these questions. More than anything else, they serve as valid reminders of how irrepressibly doom and gloom American newscasts are. The truth is, it could be really bad. North Korea is without a doubt one of the most unstable and downright scary places on the planet. That they have been in a 50-year cold war with my current home-country should be much more frightening than it is. But here's the deal: the concerns of my American friends remind me of these things, and without them, I probably wouldn't give the north much thought. Surprising?

Most Koreans are not worried about North Korea in the slightest. My co-teacher once told me that many Koreans - herself included - see Kim Jong Il's rocket play as nothing more than malevolent chest thumping - actually, the word she used was "hobby." In practice, North Korea only effects the south in a few very basic ways, none of which are particularly scary. First, all Korean men must begin a term of military service between the ages of 18-25. But these terms are usually just pesky recesses from life, in which the young men perform mindless work (one friend of mine told me he cut down trees for most of his tour) in rural parts of the country, and apparently all have an awkward experience with a hooker. Second, Korea* is essentially made into an island since there are no available land routes connecting to the rest of the Asian continent. Though all that means is Koreans have to fly more, and they do so easily out of Incheon airport, which I can resolutely say is the best airport I've ever been in. Save for the monthly "Invasion Preparedness Drill" - which actually are pretty surreal - the presence of North Korea does very little to effect the daily goings on in the south.

My feelings on this casual attitude are mixed. On one hand, I'm glad to be part of a society that's not living in a state of fear and constantly prepping itself for a war. In fact, and I see the absurd irony in this, I was much more afraid while living in the United States. I know that Koreans see America as a much more dangerous place, and they're exactly right - despite who their northern neighbor is. But I digress. Ok, on the other hand, IF - and this is a big if - but if North Korea becomes violent with the south, I can easily scamper on back to the USA. Koreans can't leave. They are 'in the fight' so to speak whether they like it or not. As a result, I feel it's perhaps a little foolhardy to be as relaxed as they collectively are. Then again, how do you go about creating a viable, thriving country when all you can do is prepare yourself for imminent doom? I think the answer is that you can't have it both ways. You either move on with the business of self-improvement or you muster the troops. Korea has clearly chosen the former, and I think the country is better off for it in the long run.

Like my American friends, Koreans also inquire about my feelings towards North Korea. They often want to know if I feel scared, and I quickly tell them that I don't. So then I ask them how they feel about the north, and while their answers are mixed in many ways, one thing is constant: South Koreans are deeply troubled by the divide, but not afraid of it. They want to be united. The idea of family connection between all Koreans is very real to people here. Essentially, the fact that so many Koreans share family names - Lee, Park, Kim, Cho - is indicative of a general feeling of connectedness. North Koreans and South Koreans are all part of the same ethnic group, and people here are tragically aware of that. I think that it genuinely pains a lot of people here that they cannot share Korea's newly-found wealth and stability with their northern brethren. There is not a hatred of North Koreans by any means - more a frustration with, and anger towards their leader and his cadre. Hearing Koreans talk about their desire for unification is something that I find tremendously touching, and it reminds me of just how momentous it will be when the border patrolmen do finally holster their arms. I can't tell you how proud I will be if I can take my children to a united Korean peninsula. The kimchi will never have tasted better.

*I've started using South Korean and Korean interchangeably. I mean, how many North Koreans do you know?

Jun 17, 2009

Jujeon Taxi Service


My friend Sam - aka Kuntz Machine, aka the Machine, aka Machine - and I have made a habit of having dinner every Monday. We have both committed ourselves to hectic teaching schedules this semester, and Mondays are one of the few days where we can actually punch out at 5pm. Usually we'll just sample tried and true Korean barbecuse in our neighborhoods, but last Monday was different. Sam decided it would be good if we went out to the Jujeon seashore and drop some pseudo-heavy coin on raw fish. I obliged, and off we went.

My raw fish experiences in Korea have been hit or miss at best. I've quietly convinced myself that Korea's anti-Japanese sentiment has relieved them of any responsibility to prepare good sushi. It's almost as if they find it patriotic to butcher such a delectable treat. Don't get me wrong; Koreans can cook like the best of them. The food might end up being my favorite thing about this place, but westerners don't do fish on the bone - which is the de facto fish serving in Korea. We yankees have been weened on the Japanese tradition, which is most certainly not thriving in the RoK. So you can see why I had serious doubts about the veracity of Sam's claims that his chosen restaurant was 'otherworldly.'

Surely enough, Sam came through. The fish blew me away. You could immediately tell that nothing in our meal had ever seen the inside of a freezer - a feeling I've pretty much never had in Korea. It was, without a doubt, the best fish I've had here. And the best part? The restaurant itself was about as sparse as any I've ever been in. Sam and I had the whole place - basically the owners' two-story house - to ourselves. I always feel somewhat circumspect of restaurants whose food and aesthetic seem equally labored over. Shouldn't the main attraction be on your plate? I didn't need muted lighting and expensive wall paper to speak to the quality of this joint. If only more American restaurants would take note. The game is in the food, not the distractions!

I don't want to say that we had a trek back to our houses, but Jujeon is a sleepy community that is noticeably different in look and feel from our urban environs. To say the least, cabs are not easily gotten, and buses almost impossible. We hadn't considered this, but just as we began to discuss our options, the owner's wife flashed her car keys at us. We looked at each other. "Is she driving us home?" And just as quickly we found ourselves in her backseat, being whisked over the mountain that separated her 'hood from ours. In effect, she closed down her restaurant to do this for us. Would that ever happen in the US? I think you all know the answer. It was a magical experience.

Jun 12, 2009

Roo-minations






It's that time of year again. Bonnaroo '09 is in full swing, and I couldn't be farther from it. And what a year to miss! I basically have to go 1/4 down the line up to find the first band I wouldn't be pumped about seeing. So what will I do to celebrate the weekend? Well, besides playing a little frisbee under today's perfect Korean sun, I'm going to indulge in some nostalgia. Here, for your viewing pleasure, are some snapshots from my own Bonnaroo ('06) experience. Three years have passed, but the images are no less vivid. In fact, they will probably be seared into my mind for longer than I care to think about. Enjoy your weekends. Hopefully there's room in there for a little good music.

Jun 10, 2009

Pleasant Surprise


I've always been aware of Larry King, but I suppose I seemed to think of him as sort of a joke. He was certainly always portrayed as such when I would read about him. From his heap of ex-wives, to the nearly 60 year gap between him and his youngest children - King just seemed somewhat too ridiculous to take seriously. He is a fossil, no doubt about it. But, I don't think he would deny that, and just recently I've come to believe that his antiquity is kind of what makes him awesome. That's right... I think Larry King is awesome.

Why? Because he just might be the last truly classic interviewer of our time. Sure, there are tons of people out there who can conduct a riveting interview, but none - at least in my opinion - do it with the panache of a Larry King. He was schooled in the world radio when radio wasn't a poor man's TV. Radio was IT. Being on radio was the ballgame, and making it meant you had genuine talent as an entertainer. King may look eerily frog-like, but his talent is undeniable. And the stupefying longevity of his career is a testament to that.

Just watch the video above and tell me you don't feel the charm just ooze out of him. The man is probably one of the most gifted story tellers I've ever heard. His are like your grandfather's greatest stories, only he's just beginning. Do yourself a favor and commit 15 min to the video. I would love to know what you think.

... eh hey.



Tell me the resemblance isn't uncanny.

Jun 5, 2009

Have a good weekend!


So because all I can think about is this Levon Helm show, I figured I might as well throw out this video before I descend into another weekend. This is actually the last song the fully united band ever played together.

Jun 4, 2009

I'm on the list.



In 2002, I discovered The Last Waltz. It changed my life. The Band's music was instantly recognizable, but mystic and somewhat impenetrable at the same time. I would later discover that whatever mystery they had lay in the fact that their musicianship was deceptively brilliant, and more or less unparalleled. My young ears simply couldn't understand what was going on. I couldn't understand how a song like Stage Fright resonated with me, becuase I certainly had never heard anything like it on the radio. I couldn't undrestand how I felt such a connection to a band without a clear leader, because hero worship was something I was very into at the time (see: Eddie Vedder, Jimmy Page, Bob Dylan). The Band's music was instinctively mature - something I was not, but something I needed to become (or at least try).

But, just as the Band's music was steeped in integrity, so too was their decision call it quits. The Last Waltz was the finale. They are one of the few bands that has never fully reformed, despite the obvious payday that would follow. However unfortunate this is for the fans, I think the absence of a reunion has kept their legacy in tact. Nobody will have to watch Robbie lose his speed, and nobody will have to see Garth miss a few notes in Tears of Rage. We're all better off this way. Suffice it to say, I never had dreams of an authentic live Band experience. I was content with the reality that live Band would only exist in my heart, my ears, and my mind. It would never be truly tangible.

Today, only three original members remain - Robbie Robertson, Garth Hudson, and Levon Helm. There is no way that these men will play together, and even if they did, their sound would be a shadow of what it was while Richard Manuel and Rick Danko were around. However, Band fanatics still have one last opportunity to taste the energy these five men once created - and that lies with Levon.

Several years ago, Helm decided to open his barn studio to the public for a series of intimate concerts. These shows - called Midnight Rambles, after the travelling minstrels Helm saw as a boy in rural Arkansas - propsered, and brought Helm's heavenly gifts back to the fore. The price of admission is not cheap, but again, this is the closest a Band fanatic can get to the real thing, and I think any of us will tell you that there's nary a price we wouldn't pay to have that. Midnight Rambles don't issue tickets. You are immediately added to a list after dropping the bills. I'm proud to say that, as of last night, I am on that list.

September 5th... Woodstock, NY... me... profoundly loving my life.


- Levon.

- the opening of a Midnight Ramble (I'm not sure what's going on with the kids).

Gnawing Passion

Totally forgot to relay this story to you guys. This week at my afterschool class the smartest kid lost at the game we were playing. Another kid was making fun of him for losing, so he bit her forearm. It brke skin and proceeded to bleed all over the game board... which we later threw away. No one wants to play on a blood stained game board. The girl's arm was alright, minus the instant bruising, blood and teeth marks. The smart kid burst into tears right away and then the girl who was crying went over to him and said "don't worry.. it's okay."?!! wtf. My CoT barely reacted or scolded the kid. Maybe it's a common occurance or he has a biting problem. Who knows.
- as told by Jen Lisi.

Jun 2, 2009

Answer me!

Three weeks ago I began teaching two evening classes at another school three times a week. These classes certainly make those days very long, but the kids are sweet and very engaged. Though I'm definitely TIRED at the end of these days, it's a real treat to hang out with some of these young'uns.

Ok, rewind three weeks to my first day. I arrived 30 minutes early for a small intro/orientation, and then got put in a classroom with a typed list of questions to ask my new students - who are all in the 4th to 6th grade range. That means none of them have been learning English for more than 3 years - keep that in mind.

These 20 questions were supposed to guage both their listening and speaking ability. I didn't end up using any of them. Here's a smattering of the 20 - I hope they convey the point I'm trying to get across.

Remember, the organizers of these classes prepared the questions in advance, assuming they were level-appropriate. I'm also not paraphrasing. The questions below are directly from the sheet, which I saved for this very opportunity.

1. What is the difference between western culture and Korean culture? (This could be a college essay).
2. What is the biggest stress in your life?
3. What country do you think will become a world super power in the future? Why?
4. Talk about a habit you have tried to break or foster.
5. What do you think is the biggest problem in Korea? Why?
6. What are some bad things about your personality?
7. What kind of food do you usually eat? Do you think the way you eat is healthy?
8. Does your father smoke? What do you think about smoking? (notice there is no hint at a mother being able to smoke...)

I hope this says something to you about the amount of pressure these kids have to learn our language. I give so many of them my utmost respect and admiration, because the truth is I - even as a 23 year old man - could not handle what they do on a daily basis.

p.s. - Hardly any of the beginner students could correctly answer when their birthday is.

Jun 1, 2009

Hey remember that... before the recession? Pt. 11

Nu metal.




(note* I was probably guilty of liking the first two tunes at one point. However, I ALWAYS hated Big Truck. That someone would ever decide that "BIG TRUCK!" is a suitable chorus will always be beyond me.)

Times were simple. Life was good.

May 30, 2009

The Obama Story

All elementary school English teachers must make a visit to the local English Zone twice a year. This entails hanging out with a group of kids in different simulated environments, and having the same scripted discourse with each and every single one of them. I finished my time there last semester thinking - on account my co teacher telling me so - that I would never have to bare this torture again. That was nothing but a cruel tease. I did have to return, and it was just as mind-numbingly tedious as the first time. However, there was one thing that kept this recent experience at least a little exciting: The Obama Story.

I discovered The Obama Story almost immediately on my first day back. There it lay, quietly calling to me amongst all the other banal preparatory English texts. 'Could this be real?' I thought. 'No way!' But sure enough, it was everything I imagined it could be. A Korean-American author and Korean illustrator had basically put together a graphic novel depicting Barack Obama's life. It is amazing. Just imagine taking someone's very real life and putting it through some sort of anime playdough-shaper. In this case, we have the magical gift to life known as The Obama Story.

Here is the cover and some selected pages to whet your appetite.






(notice this is where he meets Michelle...)

Does the President or any of his people know this exists? I've seen a lot of things in Korea, but this ranks way up there in almost all categories... hilarity, ridiculousness, awkwardness, etc etc...

(Do yourself a favor and zoom in on that text if you can't read it. Korea!)

May 29, 2009

I Caved (Phish - Harry Hood - 10.21.95)



1:30 - 8:45 is really all that matters. It's not for everyone, but goddamn is it powerful for those in its grasp... myself included.

Enjoy your weekend!

May 28, 2009

Pugilistic Proclivities


I know that I've already detailed my students' love for violent physical contact, but I feel that I must update now that their tactics have changed. Yes, the hitting still goes down. However, I've realized that most of the intra-student hitting has been confined to girl on boy situations. Boys, for the most part, are not assaulting each other with the viciousness that they recieve from the girls. But, the boys are most definitely still hurting each other.

I've noticed a massive uptick in what I call 'pain games' amongst the dudes. Now I don't want to make it seem like these are a phenomenon unique to Korea. I absolutely played my fair share of bloody knuckles and indian rug burn when I was a little son-of-a-bitch. Little boys fuck around in the same way that small animals do. It's fun, sure, but there's a tangible proving ground element as well. All boys want to know who can hit the hardest, run the fastest, and take the most pain. It's part of growing up, though, it's somewhat disquieting that these tendencies really never leave most men. If anything, they just get watered down with maturity. I can't believe that they ever fully die.

Korean 'pain games' are pretty standard. The two most popular are 'the two finger stinger' and 'the third eye'- as I call them. In the 'stinger,' two opponents will square off in a wicked rock/paper/scissors match, and the loser must take bare a well-practiced two-finger slap to the bound underbelly of the forearm. 'The third eye,' which I consider to be much more unfortunate, is also based off a r/p/s match, only this time the loser must take a vicious finger flick (think paper football) to the forehead. For some reason that seems like the absolute opposite of pleasant. A finger slap I can take, but an unchecked flick to my face... fucking forget about it!

I can't emphasize enough how commonplace these games are on a daily basis. I bet I could look up from this screen right now and see at least two games going on. Yes! Literally, right now there are four games happening around me, including one mixed-gender game - a pretty progressive move on the part of the players. But like so many things in elementary school, I get the distinct sense that these games are all part of a fad. Like pogs and Tickle-me-Elmo, I'm sure these pain games will blow away in the next few weeks. Fads, like pain games themselves, are certainly not confined to one part of the globe.

Finally, I want to shed light on the one difference I've seen between Korean pain games and American pain games: the amount of tears shed. In Korean pain games, someone inevitably cries. This is concrete. Now, in America I feel that nagging parents would have nipped this all in the bud by saying, "Don't start this, because one of you will surely start crying!" But Korean parenting doesn't work that way. Many women here have told me that parents' views on fighting are much more laissez faire. In short, many parents believe that fighting is natural, and that basic rough-housing provides an opportunity for personal growth. And how does that ethos manifest itself? Korean kids are fighting/hitting/flicking each other ALL THE TIME. And, like I said, one boy in the group will always cry.

So it's gotten to the point where I no longer care about kids crying, and I don't know how I should feel about it. On one hand, I partially agree that kids should learn some conflict resolution skills by actually getting their hands dirty. Parents could never simulate the intense pressure of having to face down a peer without a safety net - which is something every child will have to do sooner or later. On the other hand, a kid crying is a kid who's very very unhappy. Isn't it my role as a teacher to keep my students as happy as possible? It's a very bizarre situation. But then again - as I keep reminding myself - I'm not in Kansas anymore.